Fun facts about Motherhood

By Samyati Mohanty

Motherhood entails numerous responsibilities, but is it easy to enjoy? If mothers were linked up to a lie detector exam and asked the same question, I doubt the majority of them would pass if they said yes.

So, tell me, "Have you been enjoying parenting lately?" And I'm not even asking, "Do you love your children?" Because I'm sure you do. No. I want you to question yourself, "Am I capable of enjoying being a mother?" And if the answer is no, I'd like to suggest that your expectations may be what's getting in the way and that is one of the motherhood facts.

You see, it appears that most women create their perceptions of parenthood and what constitutes a good mother long before they become mothers. So, one of the fun facts about being a mom is we create our opinions about wonderful mothers based on sweet movie scenes or seeing a cute mom at a restaurant with all her tiny ducklings sitting neatly through a meal. And we think to ourselves, "One day, I'll have it!"

Your conclusions are based solely on what you observe.

But what we don't know is that just twenty seconds before entering into that restaurant, that same immaculate mother had an explosive outburst with her children about their unruly conduct. She threatened to cancel their trip to the amusement park the following day. "If you can't sit through one blessed meal at a restaurant without someone bursting out laughing, I'll cancel our ride before you can say, Hurray!" But, of course, we didn't see that portion when we were younger. We only watched the sitting still phase and developed our expectations based on that.

Sounds crazy, doesn't it? Maybe. But is this true? Yes, I believe so. And it's ironic that we let our ideas about what parenting should be like form before we're even mothers. One would not feel at ease learning to fly a plane by simply seeing a pilot do it from a distance. Similarly, one would not want to cut someone's hair simply by watching someone else do it. So why would a woman presume she understands what parenthood entails before becoming a mother? That is completely absurd. That kind of thinking makes us feel as if we're not doing it right, which diminishes our joy as mothers. And that isn't simply foolish. That's unfortunate.

I believe that what prevents moms from experiencing joy is the belief that parenthood should not be untidy. Some people believe that they are preferable to having a tween who talks back to them. Or kids who fight on the way home from school. Some people assume that if they keep trying to figure out how to control it, they will eventually figure it out. And by figured out, I mean they try to make everything about parenting flawless. But until mothers do, they stress in the little moments, robbing moms of the capacity to enjoy their babies' infancy. Meanwhile, their mothers' childhood is passing them by.

Learning to accept the flaws.

Because they aren't entirely mature, children are a mix of sweet and sour. Even the best parents will experience a combination of pleasant and sour experiences. Sweet in the sense that your infant decides to take an extra-long nap, giving you the opportunity to compose an essay. Mixed with sour, as when that baby is still sleeping, but your toddler's preschool calls to inform you that your other kid puked on the floor and that you should come get him up right away.

Enjoying motherhood does not imply laughing at a toddler's tantrum. Because no one wants to do it. (Please don't tell me if you do.) To enjoy parenthood, you must be able to keep the tantrum in perspective and move through it with ease. It's understanding that from the ages of two to three, even supermom can't avoid a tantrum. So allowing your day, or even your next 30 minutes, to be wrecked is a waste of your time and energy. It's the difference between saying, "If I had been a better mother, I could have stopped that." "What's wrong with me?" to "OK, I just got through it. "What comes next?" Raising children is far too difficult to take seriously. A happy parent can teach your child more than an angry one.

Finding joy in the midst of chaos.

Don't be concerned if your child asks for five items as they pass the toy aisle at a store. Consider your childhood and the toys you wished you had. Do you understand why they want the toys? Because they're small, and toys are great when you're small! Instead of becoming frustrated, ask them about their favourite toys and listen to their small voices. For every moment of difficulty that a child presents, there is an equal opportunity to enjoy them. So look for those opportunities. Because the little things are the big things. Mothers frequently miss out on the most crucial aspects of parenting because they are focused on the wrong things, and society plays a significant role in misguiding them and ignoring motherly intuitions. So, if you're looking for perfection, don't skip out on the sweetness. What we should think is that the perfection of children lies in their flaws.

When the commotion reminds you that you have THEM, you will be able to embrace motherhood—to find joy in chaos. And by them, I don't mean the illusion of what women formerly thought having children was. No. I'm talking about the genuine pleasure that comes from pausing to appreciate the total sweetness of the unavoidable mess that you and every mother now recognise it to be. Was. And will always be. And that’s what makes worth celebrating motherhood with all the fun facts for mother's day.